


Friends Don't Love Me Like You

by BlackIrises



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Friends With Benefits, Happy Ending, M/M, One Shot, again because i can't deal with sad endings, just a little bit, larry - Freeform, larry stylinson - Freeform, mentions of nouis but only for a sentence if that really counts, mentions of sex but nothing more
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-27
Updated: 2015-04-27
Packaged: 2018-03-26 03:04:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3834631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackIrises/pseuds/BlackIrises
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Maybe that’s when the kisses began to suffocate him, when the cuddling began to hurt. Maybe, just maybe, when he noticed Louis checking out the cute barista from Starbucks and realized that his best friend would never really feel the same was when everything about their arrangement began to tear Harry apart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Friends Don't Love Me Like You

Harry once thought kissing Louis felt nice. More than nice, even, Like a paradise, a paradise where everyone was happy and each colour on the spectrum shone vibrantly. He once thought holding Louis was nice, too. Not quite as nice as kissing him, but nice nonetheless. He once thought just hanging _around_ Louis was nice, so nice that he could spend his whole life doing so.

But when did things change? When did kissing Louis begin to feel suffocating? When did holding Louis begin to feel more like holding burning iron? When did hanging around Louis begin to make him feel an indescribable sort of anger?

Harry figures it was when he was sure that they’d never really be anything more than friends. Friends with benefits, that is. You see, the two of them had struck up a deal just a year prior, when they’d both found themselves dumped, angry, and without another to hold. It had started with Louis ringing Harry, the older boy sobbing into the phone and going on about how much he hated Niall, how much he wanted the stupid blonde’s head bashed in for being a cheater. Harry, being the supportive friend he’d always been, agreed with Louis before inviting him over to his flat for a movie night to take his mind off the break up. Louis agreed without hesitating, as movie nights had never been anything out of the ordinary for them. But unbeknownst to the two friends, that seemingly normal night would take them places they each only had the chance to fantasize about.

Louis had gotten cold halfway through whatever movie Harry had picked - no, he wasn’t paying attention, he had too much shit on his mind to listen to Shia LaWhatever’s antics - and being the gentlemen he loved to be, Harry offered his embrace. Louis happily took it, and before they knew it, they were cuddling closer than they ever had. This, combined with the talk of despising relationships that Louis sprung up as the credits of the movie began to roll led Harry to suggest something he thought he’d never regret - a friends with benefits arrangement.

“Why not?” He had said, noticing that his best friend didn’t actually seem all that deterred by the idea. “We’re both single, we both can’t stand relationships, and sexual frustration builds pretty damn quickly.”

Louis appeared hesitant about the idea at first, but it soon went away once they both agreed that no strings attached would be the best for them, especially since they’d both gotten their hearts broken plenty of times and didn’t want to endure that type of pain again. Besides, Louis always did have a small crush on Harry, and so the chance to snog his rather attractive best friend definitely wasn’t one he’d ever want to turn down.

The next morning, the two had found themselves sweaty, sticky, and tangled together beneath the soft fabric of Harry’s bedsheets. Of course, it was horribly awkward the first morning, but life carried on after that, along with their arrangement.

In fact, their arrangement carried on quite well for almost a year afterwards, both of them secretly enjoying the sex a lot more than they thought they should have. They kept it a secret from all their friends, obviously, and for a while really did believe that they had taken the best course of action. But the sex eventually brought on kissing, and legitimate, almost romantic cuddling, and despite trying his hardest, Harry started to fall for Louis in the one way he swore to both himself and the older lad he never would.

Maybe that’s when the kisses began to suffocate him, when the cuddling began to hurt. Maybe, just maybe, when he noticed Louis check the cute, red-headed barista from Starbucks and realized that his best friend would never really feel the same was when everything about their arrangement began to tear him apart.

That had been only a month ago, and now, as he lay with his back against his bed, heatedly kissing Louis, he knew he couldn’t take it anymore. His hands, which had once been exploring the smooth expanse of skin under Louis’ t-shirt, forcefully shoved Louis upwards and away.

Confusion scrunched together the blue-eyed boys features. “Something wrong, Har-”

Harry didn’t let Louis finish his sentence. “I can’t do it anymore!” He rolled off the bed, scanning the cream-coloured carpet for his discarded jumper.

Louis ran a hand through his fringe before hopping off the bed himself. Moments earlier, he had been having a great time snogging the younger lad senseless, so to him there had been no telling what could’ve set Harry off. “Hey, hey, calm down… What’s gotten into you all of a sudden?”

Harry could feel the anger and hurt sting his eyes as he swung his head in Louis’ direction. “I can’t do this anymore. This arrangement? I can’t.” He was still shaking his head when he leaned down to swipe his sweater from the far corner of the room.

Louis watched him pull the dark cotton over his head, puzzled. “But… Why not? What’s brought this on?” The older boy felt somewhat betrayed - because why the hell would Harry want to stop something so perfect? Sure, he _had_ dealt with the issue of romantic feelings towards Harry on more than one occasion, and sure, it did sometimes make him regret agreeing to their arrangement, but that didn’t mean he ever just wanted to stop said arrangement completely. He really did think that things were going pretty damn well for the both of them, which only made the whole situation all the more confusing for him.

Harry was almost out the door when his response came. “It’s…” He squeezed his eyes shut, willing back unwanted tears. He didn’t think it’d be this hard. “This has gone too far. I’m sorry.”

The tone of finality in his deep voice scared Louis. Without another thought, he rushed towards Harry. “What’re you talking about? Harry, _please_ , you can’t just walk out in the middle of-”

“Yes I-”

Louis lunged forward with a squeak, wrapping his hand around Harry’s wrist as the younger boy began to make his exit. “Why do I feel like I’m never going to see you again after this?”

In his head, Harry chuckled bitterly. Seeing Louis as it was was already much too hard to handle, and he knew he wouldn’t ever be able to look at Louis again without feeling a stab in his heart because god be damned if he hadn’t fallen in love with his only best friend over the course of the last year. It was then that he truly realized how much he hated himself for suggesting the idea of a friends with benefits relationship in the first place. No amount of mind-blowing sex (and _damn_ , was it mind-blowing) with Louis could ever be make up for the broken friendship Harry was now finding himself left with.

“‘S because you’re probably not going to see me again.” Harry said bluntly, tilting his head to the ceiling so he wouldn’t have to face Louis. He didn’t want to see how pissed off the older boy would be with him, but in reality, the only thing he didn’t see was the look of pure devastation that devoured Louis’ face at his words. He yanked his wrist from Louis’ grasp and then, without another word, stomped from the bedroom to retrieve his shoes. He just wanted to get back to his flat and collapse in his bed, maybe take a shot or two to help him forget the way he felt about his best friend, but a firm tug on his hand stopped him.

“At least explain to me why this is happening.” Louis’ voice was weak, as if he was holding back tears. Harry had known him for long enough to know that that was most likely the case. “Tell me why you just want to end _everything_ we have.”

For no apparent reason, Harry felt naked and exposed in front of his best friend for the first time in as long as he could remember. Turning to the blue-eyed boy was harder than he had thought it’d be, the expression he found on his older best friend’s face making everything infinitely worse. He couldn’t recall a time Louis had looked so broken up about something - Hell, he hadn’t even looked so upset when Niall had practically shattered his heart. Did that mean Harry had shattered Louis’ heart? The thought sent dread straight to his stomach. “Do you really want to know?” His voice, not unlike Louis’, was weak.

Louis nodded with uncertainty, pulling his still kiss-swollen bottom lip in between his teeth. “I won’t let you leave without a proper explanation.”

Harry’s broad shoulders rose and fell twice before he opened his mouth. “I like you. More than I should. More than this relationship-arrangement-thingy we have calls for.” He’d be blind if he missed the prominent widening of Louis’ shocked blue eyes. “I’d go as far to say that I love you. Yeah, I know. I’m fucking pathetic. This was supposed to be no strings attached, no emotions involved, but I went and screwed it all up. I’m sorry. But now, everytime I kiss you, or I hold you, or I spend time around you, it hurts because I know that you’re never going to feel the same way because that’s what we agreed on and I broke the damn rules. I can’t do it anymore. I can’t do us anymore. So I’m leaving. You can forget this ever happened. I’m sorry I ruined our friendship because of this.” His words tumbled out faster than he’d ever wanted, but at that point he couldn’t find it within himself to care. He’d just simultaneously lost his best friend and a surreal arrangement that granted him sex with one of the hottest guys he knew, so nothing really mattered all that much to him.

Louis, however, was still stuck on the ‘I love you’ portion of Harry’s speech. Harry loved him? The Harry Styles, the man he’d crushed on for as long as his memory functioned, the man he’d only dreamt about sharing a life with, felt the same way? He was so stuck on Harry’s words that he hardly registered the younger boy pulling away from him and slipping his boots on, hardly registered him making his way through the front door of his flat. It took the sound of the front door slamming to knock Louis from his trance. In a panic - because fuck, did Harry really just leave? - Louis whipped the door open and chased after Harry, flinging his smaller body into Harry’s larger one once he caught up to him in front of the elevator. The two were almost sent tumbling to the ground, but Harry grabbed at the wall to stabilize them before they could fall.

Panting and without a word said to Harry, Louis swiftly pressed his lips to the younger boy’s, only pulling away once the elevator dinged and opened. He thanked whatever God was above that there was no one inside.

“What’re you doing!?” Harry asked, bewildered. His eyes were glassy, but Louis couldn’t tell if it was hope or annoyance residing behind his irises.

The smaller boy smiled nervously, now hyper aware that Harry was basically carrying him. “I needed to show you that maybe I feel the same way?”

Harry sputtered, actually sputtered. He couldn’t believe his ears, but figured he didn’t have to because damn, did the kiss Louis gave him moments after prove to him that he was telling the truth.

Louis pulled back, resting his forehead against Harry’s as he sucked in some air to even out his breathing. “Now how about we go back to my flat and talk this out, yeah?” He suggested, cheeks turning one of the lightest shades of pink Harry had ever saw.

With a deft nod, Harry set Louis down, grabbed his hand, and the two of them walked back to Louis’ flat in a calm silence, both beyond relieved that their arrangement didn’t stay strictly emotion-free.

****  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Sooooo there's my second fic :0  
> I really hope you're liking these, because I've discovered that I'm in love with writing them. 
> 
> Thanks for reading xx


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